Respect & Relationships: Act Right.

Amy Dodd Pilkington
5 min readJan 27, 2021

People seem to have forgotten that the most basic part of every relationship is respect. Without respect, every relationship is doomed to fail. It doesn’t matter if it is a friendship or a romantic relationship. Respect is the foundation. Remove it, and that relationship will crumble.

I know you have heard how important trust is, and that is true. However, respect is even more important. Without it, there can be no trust. Being disrespectful is the quickest way to ruin a friendship or marriage.

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Let me start by saying that I am seeing a level of disrespect that is alarming. It seems like people just don’t know how to act now. There is so much hatred, and basic human decency is disappearing. It has to stop, or you are going to find yourself alone in the world with no friends and no partner. How do we fix it? Well, I will tell you some of the things I have seen and what needs to be done.

First, forget what people have told you about how relationships are hard work. Throw that whole thing out the window. If you feel like you are drained by working to keep a relationship going, move on. Yes, relationships take some work, but if you are struggling to find the energy to make it work then you are in the wrong relationship. Move along. You shouldn’t be fighting all day every day to keep things going. Just move on.

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Now that I have said that, I’m going to move on to how people are sabotaging their own relationships. I cannot say this enough: Stop making your personal business a public display. Just stop. It’s childish, and you’re never going to have any kind of lasting relationship when you can’t keep your business to yourself.

Let me ask you this. How many times have you been mad about something and told people about it? Now, how many times have you moved on from being mad only to have some of those people you told still mad long after the issue is settled? THAT RIGHT THERE IS YOUR PROBLEM.

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Did your partner make you mad and you told your friends? They will still harp on it long after you are over it, and it will keep being an issue because others won’t let it go. They will drag you back into it. That’s your fault. Keep your business your business or your friends will keep you running back to the same argument in an endless loop of nonsense. Just keep your mouth shut. It’s not hard.

And while I am on the subject of other people in relationships, stop entertaining other people and stop inviting trouble into your relationship. Don’t flirt. Don’t talk to other people, and definitely don’t talk about sex and drop sexual innuendos. Just don’t do it. You’re sabotaging your relationship by disrespecting your partner. Don’t post revealing photos with flirty messages. Stop with these nonsense TBH and ask me any question posts. You are begging for trouble, and you’re being disrespectful. It’s public flirting, and everyone else sees it. Stop. Being. Disrespectful.

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Don’t act single and expect to stay in a relationship. Go ahead and keep flirting and being disrespectful all the way back to being single. If you cannot stop flirting, you can go on and be single. You’re not ready for a relationship. Your significant other should be the only one you’re talking to. Show some respect for them by acting like you’re in a relationship. Until you can do that, don’t expect a decent relationship. Nobody wants to worry about what their partner is doing with someone else.

Don’t put your disrespect on display and act like you’re a victim when you’re called out on it, either. Just no. If you’re going to put your behavior on display, don’t act upset when you get called out on it. Don’t bother trying to call me out for calling it like I see it. I’m not to blame for your relationship woes. You are.

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Act right and be respectful and you’ll be respected. Don’t entertain all sorts of people and then wonder why your relationship is bad. It’s you, sweetie. Learn. How. To. Act. And if you can’t, go be single. Married folks have to behave like married folks or they won’t stay married long.

Stop putting your business on display. Stop flirting. Stop entertaining folks.

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Start being respectful. Start acting married. Start taking responsibility for your own actions.

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Or be single. Your choice. But you better make the choice before it’s made for you. It’s not hard to show basic respect for your partner. It’s not hard at all. If you really, truly love your partner, then you don’t have time or space for anyone else. Do you love your partner? Do you want your relationship to work? Act like it and show some respect. And keep your business to yourself.

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Amy Dodd Pilkington

Pilkington is an aspiring beach bum who enjoys travel and sweet tea. This published author has been featured in Health Magazine and many other publications.